If Anyone Objects - Side Shots
by mindluver
Summary: Companions of 'If Anyone Objects'. Not slash, but they likely won't make sense if you're not reading the original story. Non-canon couples, but lots of fun!
1. Chapter 1

_**If Anyone Objects – Morgan and Garcia (Side Shot)**_

 _[A/N: This is a little diddy about the Morgan/Garcia relationship. It's set before Morgan comes back to work. No spoilers. I hope you like it. I don't own CM. I only borrow.]_

…

"Okay, let's get started. We've all been reviewing cold cases. Has anyone found any new evidence we could pursue in order to help the local LEOs?" Rossi asked.

Morgan sat at the table looking at the ten folders in front of him. He'd had a hard time profiling the crimes based on the lacking information in the files, but he'd done his best. He'd provided a profile of the victimology and the UnSub. Garcia had helped him with searching for information which wasn't available when the crimes were committed and when Nick slept, Morgan worked.

He had a lot of things running through his mind he was having problems reconciling. The work he'd brought home helped him settle things. Garcia made sure he had food to eat and the baby had food. She got the two of them on a schedule when they'd returned from Chicago, and Morgan was grateful. She stopped by his house every day to check on them, but she left every evening. That was the problem.

He wanted… _desperately_ …to convince her he was serious about his feelings for her. Unfortunately, she laughed him off at every turn. She told him he was firing on her because he was club-deprived. It didn't matter how much he told her she was wrong. She had a comeback and would then leave to go to her own apartment. It was frustrating.

Morgan had time to profile the situation…and her, if he was being honest. She'd lost her parents when she was eighteen, and she was lost for a period of time before Hotch coerced her into working for the FBI. There were a lot of insecurities imbedded deeply in her psyche which would be a high hurdle for Morgan to jump.

Years of flirting between the two of them and his randy lifestyle…about which he'd been reminded too many times, especially from Reid…had only reinforced the gap Penelope perceived between them. Not once in the entire time they'd known each other had the woman asked him what type of woman attracted him. By the same token, he'd never volunteered it because they were co-workers, and for many years, that was a bridge Derek Morgan was unwilling to cross.

That was until Garcia was there for him when he desperately needed someone. The way in which she took care of him and his son? It opened his eyes to the truth right in front of him.

Penelope Garcia was a beautiful woman with a personality he adored. She loved him, he was certain…based on the fact she'd worn black to the wedding…and she stepped in when he needed someone to help him make sense of the disaster his life had become in the aftermath of Magret. If he had to spend his dying breath convincing Garcia he was in love with her, then so be it.

"Hotch and I've been looking at a case…" Reid began.

Morgan tuned out the rest until he heard Hotch state, "The father gave up on them, and the police weren't motivated. We believe the two females left the restaurant after it closed, but neither the mother, nor the daughter, turned up anywhere. We think someone helped them with their escape. We've searched for an accomplice to the mother, but we've run into a dead end," Hotch described.

"Resolution would require a trip to Detroit and Chicago to retrace the case. We don't have any new leads to go on to justify the trip, but I'd say it's worth contacting locals and providing the updated information," Reid explained.

Hotch took over. "I agree. Maybe they'd be willing to look at the case again and invite us to visit. The father, Chris Hall, is still alive. I'm sure he'd like to know what happened to his daughter."

Morgan listened to the two men speak, noticing how close they seemed to be. They seemed to move in tandem, nodding in support of each other as the information was delivered in somewhat tag-team fashion. At the end of the briefing, Morgan was jealous.

He was certain there was more to the relationship between Hotch and Reid, but they weren't talking about it, though they did give each other more than just passing glances. Morgan would have given anything to have the same relationship with Garcia, but she wasn't having any of it. She was definitely holding him at arms-length while providing his son with all the love she had inside her. It was frustrating.

As Morgan was about to say he believed it was worth the pursuit of the Hall cold case, his phone vibrated in his pocket. He discreetly pulled it out while Rossi quizzed Reid and Hotch regarding the profile they were ready to put forth. Morgan saw a message from Garcia, which brought a smile.

 _I was thinking about getting Chinese take-out for lunch and bringing Nicky up to the lair from daycare. I'd bet he could have some veggie fried rice. You want in? PG…and it's only my initials ; )_

' _There's that flirting I've been missing,'_ Morgan thought as he listened to the team pick through another case.

 _ **Oh, baby girl, I'm all in. I think Nick is ready to try a little rice, though he might spit it out, but we'll give it a shot. Please order me beef and broccoli. Have them call me when it comes in. I'll bring the food. You bring the drinks and the sass. Looking forward to it. M…and that's the rating for what I wanna do to you.**_

"…Morgan? You have a case?" Rossi asked.

Derek looked up and smiled. "I have ten, but I think its best if I send the info to the locals and let them look it over for themselves. I don't think us regurgitating it here would be helpful," he responded.

Hotch stood and grabbed Morgan by the shoulder. "May I speak with you?"

Morgan nodded and followed him up to his office, noticing a lot of boxes spread around the space. The two men sat, and Morgan saw Hotch take a deep breath. "I stepped down because I'm leaving the BAU.

"For reasons I won't go into, I'm transferring to White Collar. I'll be promoted, but it's hush-hush for now. I've recommended you for Unit Chief, Morgan. Rossi doesn't want it. He agreed to the 'acting' role as a favor to me. For personal reasons, he doesn't want the job," Hotch explained.

Morgan chuckled. "I feel him. I don't want it for personal reasons either because if my life works out the way I hope? I'm gonna have somebody helpin' me raise my boy. I just need to work out a few details."

When Hotch started laughing, Morgan was surprised. After he calmed, Morgan cocked an eyebrow at him. "Nobody wants the job because we're all going to be conflicted. The only one who wouldn't have a conflict is JJ and that's because she's married to a DC cop. What the hell are we going to do?" Hotch asked with an uncharacteristic smile. Morgan knew it had everything to do with Reid, though Hotch wouldn't admit it. The boy could make anyone smile.

Morgan stewed for a minute. "What about Reid? Look, the boy's young, but he's lived a million lifetimes. If you transfer, he doesn't have a conflict. Pen answers to him, just like me, and Rossi and Prentiss? Same deal. He's ready for it, Hotch. It might just be the pressure he needs to finally see what a great agent he really is. We'll all be here for him, and when he gets home at night, well…I'm sure he'll have someone to take care of him," Morgan teased with a wink.

The two men laughed and went back to the bullpen. "Can we break for lunch?" Morgan asked Rossi. The relief on the man's face brought a laugh to all in attendance.

After Hotch and Reid took off…not discreetly at all…Morgan called down to the front desk and alerted them he was waiting for carryout. When he hung up, he hurried to follow Rossi and Prentiss to the break room. "I need to talk to you."

Rossi nodded as he pulled out a plastic container and popped it into the microwave. Prentiss gathered paper plates and plastic utensils before sitting down at a table with two bottles of Snapple.

"Cop a squat. You want some lasagna? Rossi and I have a competition going regarding who's the best cook. You can be an impartial judge," Emily offered.

Morgan took her hand and kissed it. "I know about you and Rossi just like I know about Reid and Hotch. Just like you know about me and Garcia. Look, Hotch is transferring whether we like it or not. He wants to be home for Jack, so he's going to head up White Collar.

"I can stay in BAU because Penelope doesn't answer to me. If I take the job as Unit Chief, she and I can't have a relationship, just like if either of you take the job, you can't have a relationship. The only logical choice for all of us is for Reid to take over. He'll have no biases to any of us after Hotch transfers, and he's as equipped as any of us to take over, except for Rossi," Morgan suggested.

Rossi laughed. "Unit Chief is the last damn thing I want to do. I'm glad I came back, and I'm committed to doing the job, but I don't want the headache of being the guy in command.

"I'm not sure if Spencer is ready to handle it solo, so I'll stay in the position, but I want to bring him in as my second, and I don't want either of you to complain. If we want this to work out the way we'd all like, Spence needs a mentor. So?" Rossi asked.

"I'm in. I mean, I'd like the chance to head up a unit, but right now, I'm pretty happy where I am, and I have a lot of things on my plate," Prentiss said as she covertly winked at Rossi.

Morgan laughed. "I know Garcia will be on board. Who's gonna talk to JJ?"

"Who's gonna talk to JJ about what? Morgan, the guard called me. Your food is here. What's going on? I'm tired of being in the dark," the blond complained, bringing a laugh to everyone. After the explanations were given, JJ was on board with the plan.

##

Morgan left the break room to go pay for the food and meet Garcia and Nicky in her office. He stopped in the break room to grab plates, napkins, and silverware. When he knocked on Garcia's door, he heard a giggle that enticed him to open the door.

What he saw when he entered the room made him grin. The woman he was in love with was holding his son on her lap while she blew raspberries on his fat neck. Nicky laughed so hard, Morgan couldn't help but join him.

"Daddy's got the food," he announced as he produced the bag.

"OOOH! This is going to be so good, baby boy," Garcia gushed as she moved over to the couch where Morgan had taken a seat.

He watched as she quickly opened the container with the fried rice and picked up the chopsticks. She loaded a few grains of rice and held it to Nicky's mouth. He opened it, because the boy wasn't a shy eater, and they watched him smush it around his mouth a few times before he spit out a few grains. She passed the baby to Morgan and stood next to him.

"Ah, not yet a fan of Chinese? Well, little man, Auntie Penny has something you'll like just as well," Morgan heard as Garcia went to the little fridge in her office.

She pulled out a container with mushed-up something and a tiny spoon from a bag on top. She hurried out of the room and returned a few minutes later with the container. Morgan watched her fill the spoon and put it to her lips, not tasting…just testing.

"How about you try this, big boy? Auntie Pen has been testing out recipes for you. This is chicken and rice. I think you might like it," she cooed at the boy before she held the spoon up to his mouth.

Morgan smelled it and he was ready to take the spoon. It smelled incredible. When Nicky took it into his mouth without any protest, the smile on Garcia's face sealed the deal. "Penelope, I love you," Morgan told her.

When she laughed, he knew the message hadn't hit home. "Aw, that's sweet. I love you as well, my Granite Adonis. I'll drop off the bigger container of this for him. I promise you, it's healthy. I've tried a few things that even I wouldn't eat, and we both know I'm not that selective about what I eat, obviously," she began.

Morgan took the spoon from her and placed it in the dish on the little table in front of her couch. "No, Pen, listen to me. _I_ love _you._ There's nothing about you that's not right up my ally, baby girl. I want us to spend more time together," he suggested.

Garcia laughed. "Derek, I know you're confused right now. After what that skinny…what Magret did to you, you're entitled to be confused. It'll take time for you to work through it, and if you want to talk to a counselor about it, I'll do for you what Reid did for Hotch. I'll keep it under the radar. I'll watch Nicky for you, and I won't say anything to anyone. I'll make sure you have the best therapist I can find.

"You need time to get over that bi…woman, and I'll be right there with you. I'm your friend, Derek. I don't expect anything more than the love we've always felt for each other. I'm grateful for what I can get," she explained.

Derek Morgan had a decision to make. He held his tongue while Garcia fed Nicky the organic baby food she'd made and offered him the organic apple juice she'd bought in the sippy cup she'd bought. It had a green frog on it, and it made Derek smile.

He was weening his son from the bottle as the pediatrician had suggested, and Garcia had been supporting him in the endeavor. It wasn't always pretty because the boy was attached to the bottle, but with patience and love, he'd finally agreed to let it go. Morgan credited Garcia's persistence. She was never one to give up, and he was grateful. She'd saved him from a fate worse than death, and he'd fallen in love with her in the process. Once the walls were down regarding the workplace, Morgan knew what he wanted. He'd almost died, and one person had been persistent in finding him. Those facts were indisputable.

Once Garcia finished feeding the boy, Morgan took Nicky to the men's room and changed his diaper before he returned him to the daycare center. He knew Garcia would keep the boy with her all afternoon, but Morgan had things he needed to make clear. Things that couldn't wait.

"Say good-bye to Auntie Pen," Morgan stated as he walked back into her lady cave.

"Aw, bye baby. I'll make sure your daddy gets the rest of that chicken rice thing, and I'll keep testing recipes. I found a site…well, you don't care. As long as it tastes good," she whispered as she kissed the little boys full cheeks.

She smiled at him with love in her eyes, and it was enough for Derek to make up his mind. "I'll be back. Don't go anywhere."

Garcia gave him a curious glance, but she nodded. He returned a sleeping Nicky to the daycare center and then took the back stairs up to Garcia's end of the hallway.

He knocked twice before he opened the door and stepped inside without invitation. He locked the door and turned to look at the bank of computers the woman used on a daily basis. "Do any of these broadcast out?" he asked as he walked over to her and stood behind her chair.

Garcia giggled. "God no. I'm tracking about a…" she began. He reached into her hair and pulled out the clip that held it up in a chignon. He also pulled out the flowery barrette she had clipped on the side over her left ear.

"Good. Do you have any assignments from Rossi you need to finish?" he whispered into her ear.

He felt the tremor when it began, but he wasn't going to stop. "Baby girl? Is anyone waiting for anything from you?" he whispered again as he brushed his lips against the shell of her left ear. He saw the goosebumps on her neck, and he knew he was getting to her.

"Um, I promised Reid I'd," she began before she took a deep breath.

"I'm pretty sure Reid won't give a tinker's damn about anything you promised him. I, however, have a case I need help on. You game?" he asked as he knelt down behind her chair and began kissing her neck gently.

When she gasped at the sensation, he smiled into her neck. "This place soundproof?" he asked as he gently sucked on the skin behind her left ear before kissing his way to the right side of her neck.

"It, um, it's soundproof and bullet proof. It has reinforced steel walls of…" she began as Morgan settled his lips against her carotid artery, feeling the beat pick up.

"Mama, I don't care how thick the walls are. I wanna show you how much you mean to me, and I don't want an audience," he whispered into her ear as he kissed up and down her neck, moving her long blond and pink hair over her left shoulder.

"Derek, please don't be cruel," she gasped as she pushed her chair away from the desk, knocking him on his ass. She wheeled on him, and he could see how pissed off she was at him, but he didn't know why.

" _HOW DARE YOU! HOW DARE YOU TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THE…_ " she began before he could get up off the floor.

He pulled her up from the chair and picked her up, carrying her to the couch and sitting with her on his lap. "Now, don't get all hateful. This is supposed to be the best time of our lives. We're falling in love, and we can't be away from each other. You beatin' on me isn't exactly the way I want us to start out. I'm not trying to take advantage of anything, Pen. I'm _trying like hell_ to get you to see that I know you love me, and I feel the same.

"It's not because you saved me from that shit in Florida. It's because of all the little things you do and it's because you've shown me what love means. You know how fucked up I am because of what happened to me when I was a kid, and you still show me love.

"You don't hold my promiscuity against me, and you love me in spite of all my bad shit. I'm so damn happy to have finally woken up to see what's been right here all along. _Please_ , give me a chance," Derek requested. He hoped he'd pled his case well because he wasn't sure what he'd do if she dismissed him.

When she struggled to get up from his lap, he held her tighter. "Don't try to get away," he warned with a smile.

He didn't expect her to pinch his inner thigh which caused him to release Garcia from his grasp. She stood and stared him down. "We both know, Derek, we're not meant to be together. Don't make this more than it is. I'm happy to help with Nicky, but I won't be made a fool. Please go," Garcia ordered.

Derek rose from the couch and walked to the door, stopping to turn around. "I'll go now because you need to do some thinkin', but baby girl, you're _mine_. You've known it longer than me, but I know it now, and I don't give up. Take your time, but don't take too much because I'm not the most patient man. But then, you know that about me.

"I'll be in touch," Derek told her as he left the room. He wasn't sure where to go from there, but he wasn't giving up. It wasn't in his personality to back down. The woman already knew it. How long it would take for her to realize it, he wasn't sure, but he'd wait. What else could he do?

If anyone objected to them being a mixed race couple? Oh, they could rot in hell.

…

 _[E/N: Hope you'll give me some feedback. Thank you for reading]_


	2. Chapter 2

_**IF ANYONE OBJECTS – ROSSI/PRENTISS**_

 _[A/N: Okay, this is the second side-shot of the Hotch/Reid story, "If Anyone Objects." This story probably won't make a lot of sense if you don't read it first. I don't own Criminal Minds. I just borrow. This is the story of the night Prentiss told Rossi a big secret!]_

…

"Dave, thanks for dinner, and thanks for the ride home. I'm sorry I'm not better company. I think I might be coming down with something," Emily Prentiss stated as she sat in the car in front of her small home in Reston.

Rossi wasn't sure what was going on with her because she'd shortened the night. He fully expected he'd be spending the night with her, as he'd done a few times prior, but she was stressed and standoffish, and he wasn't accustomed to that side of her. One thing he liked about Emily Prentiss was her honesty. She didn't play games, and he appreciated it.

 _When Emily asked David Rossi out for dinner one Wednesday night when the team was in town, he didn't expect it to amount to anything more than a counseling session. Looking back on it, he remembered being pissed with himself because he had a date to meet Erin Strauss at her apartment for a good old-fashioned fuck. They had a lot of history together, but when he sat with Emily and got to know her, their chemistry was undeniable._

 _That first night, he'd hugged her and made sure she got to her car safely. He called Strauss and apologized, telling her he'd been detained by his editor and he was going to be busy over the next several weeks with rewrites on his latest book. It was about the Reaper case, and Aaron had given him permission to write it. It seemed like a plausible excuse for standing the Section Chief up for a date. With Bureau politics as they were, Erin Strauss wasn't going to complain to anyone. She was a superior after all._

 _Unfortunately, the more time Rossi spent with Prentiss, the more intrigued and entangled he'd become with the beautiful young woman. They began spending 'off' hours together, and one night over some very good food and even better wine, they'd slept together. When they woke the next morning to the sound of both cell phones going off, they decided to keep the relationship a secret, but they weren't walking away. It was far too good to walk away._

"Emily, sweetheart, are you okay? You look a little pale, and I've noticed you're not as exuberant as usual. Is your mother okay?" Rossi asked, knowing the relationship between her and her diplomat mother wasn't exactly happy. They'd had enough pillow talk about it for him to understand. No need to hash it over.

The younger woman turned to him and smiled. "You're the caretaker, aren't you? You've had three failed marriages, about which you're open. You've taken the blame in every case, and you never say anything negative about them.

"You retired from the BAU and took ten years to work through your issues and write your books. You came back, touting 'unfinished business', but after we got to the bottom of that case and it was solved, you stayed.

"You've been seeing me and Strauss at the same time, but lately, you've blown her off to spend time with me. She's not happy about it, but you don't care. Why?" the younger woman asked him as they sat in the car.

After several minutes of contemplation, Rossi chuckled. "I hate to be a cliché, but you're young and beautiful and I'm drawn to you. I got in the way of Erin's career back in the day, and she decided we were over. She gave me no say in the matter, but I won't lie and say we haven't slept together a few times before you and I started spending more time together.

"It's over with her. I've told her. She didn't like it, but she's accepted it. Most of the anti-fraternization rules were written based on shit I did in my younger days, but Emily, I really care about you. You're the first woman I've met in years who doesn't have an agenda. You take me at face value, and I appreciate it.

"We've been seeing each other for what? Five-six months? I don't see why we should stop. Aren't you happy about things? Is it too much to keep the relationship underground?" Rossi asked.

He saw Emily laughing a little, but he didn't see a smile on her face. She took a deep breath and turned to look at him. "I'm pregnant, David. I know all about your very Catholic upbringing, and I'm Catholic as well. I'm not sure what to do about this. I'll see you tomorrow," she told him as she left the car and closed the door.

Rossi didn't turn to see she got in the door safely. He couldn't move his head at all. His thoughts were too heavy at that moment, and he wasn't sure what to do. He sat back in his seat after he turned off the motor, too stunned to drive. A clear head was needed, but he wasn't sure he had one. He wasn't sure when he'd ever have one again.

For fifteen minutes, he sat in Emily's driveway as his mind's eye gave him an instant replay of the night that got away from them. That was likely the night the baby had been conceived.

" _I had a great time, Rossi," Prentiss stated. She was a little tipsy as she stumbled out of the car. Rossi worried about her falling, so he hurried around the car, having skipped a nightcap in favor of coffee. He wanted his head together when he was around Emily Prentiss. The woman fascinated him._

 _He rounded the car and wrapped his arm around her waist. "I had a great time as well, Emily. Let's get you inside," he stated quietly as he led her to the front porch and up to the door. She handed him the key and he smiled. An understanding had been reached._

 _The rest of the night was amazing. They'd made love several times, and hell, Rossi was impressed with his own performance. He wasn't a spring chicken, but he'd been able to hold his own with the beautiful young woman. That had to say something about him._

 _The last time they made love, things started before either of them remembered the condom. Emily told him she'd gone off birth control because of her age, and due to the fact neither was celibate, they'd used condoms. Emily had a few, and they'd used them, but that last time…they'd had a snack of cheese and crackers during a lively discussion regarding their times at the Academy. When the tray was tossed over the side of the bed, the couple forgot everything until Rossi was nearly ready to let go. It was then he remembered it felt really good and it occurred to him he'd skipped the condom. He pulled out, but…_

"Fuck me. I'm fifty-three years old, and I've had a child, but he didn't live long enough for it to really sink in. Three wives and no kids. Now? _Now?_ " he whispered in the confines of his car.

He took a deep breath and got out of the car, closing the door quietly so as not to wake the neighbors. He walked up on Emily's porch and knocked as quietly as possible.

When she opened the door, he could see the redness of her eyes. He felt a sharp pain at his ankle and looked down to see a black cat, claws out. He jumped a bit and leaned down to pick up the cat.

"Who's this?" he asked as he looked at Emily.

"Sergio. He's new in my life," she explained.

Rossi laughed and then remembered something he'd read. "He has a litter box?"

Emily looked at him as if he'd lost his mind. "No, he uses the toilet. Of course he has a litter box. Why?" she asked.

"There's an illness called toxoplasmosis. It's a parasite, and it's transmitted through cat poop and kitty litter. If you're cleaning the litter box, it could pose a problem. Can we give the cat to Hotch for a while? Morgan has Clooney, who would likely eat the cat, but I'd like our baby to have a fighting chance if you decide to have it," Rossi offered.

Emily stepped aside and let him into her home. He closed the door and pulled her into his arms. "I'm…I'm scared. I've been married, and I'm not good at it. I've thought about children over the years, but after losing James when I was married to Caroline, I didn't think I'd ever have a chance. I took it as God saying I wouldn't make a good father.

"I'll support you with regard to however you want to handle this, Emily, but I have to admit, I've fallen for you. If I was ever going to have a child, I could see it with you," Rossi explained.

He saw her slow smile and wanted to laugh. Emily Prentiss had a bullshit meter that outweighed his own. She didn't have to smell it…she could see it.

"God. Go upstairs and let me lock up. Please tell me you're clean because if you have syphilis or something, I'm going to shoot you in the crotch and watch you die a slow death," she threatened.

Rossi pulled her into his arms and kissed her soft lips. The age difference was significant, but it was tolerable. She was his equal in every sense of the word. She challenged him like no other woman, and it had been incredible, in his mind. She was the kind of woman he'd looked for all his life. She was his perfect mate.

"I'm always careful with my sexual health. How that damn condom broke I don't know, but I can only guess it was meant to be. I'll lock the doors and set the alarm. You're mine now, you know. A part of me is growing inside you. If you decide to keep us, well, we'll take care of you, not that you need it."

Rossi pushed Emily toward the stairs and gave her a gentle swat on her backside. When she turned to look at him, he smiled. She returned his smile as she jogged up the stairs. He locked the doors and checked the windows. If they were going to be a family? They were going to be safe.

That night, he stayed the night and only held Emily. They had plans to make, but he was optimistic of their chances. It was a surprise to him that he was excited about having a child at his age. After a certain age, he'd thought he'd missed his shot, and he'd reconciled himself to it. When Emily Prentiss told him she was pregnant, David Rossi wanted to hold a parade in her honor. If his old, Italian mother wasn't dead, she'd have been dancing in the streets chanting that her little Davey was going to be a Papa. The word sounded perfect in his head. He hoped they sounded equally as perfect in Emily's head. He was pretty sure having a child with Emily would be amazing.

"What are people going to say about us, Dave?" Emily asked as Rossi felt her snuggle into his chest.

He could only think of one response. "If anyone objects to the two of us getting together to have a family? _Possono andare all'inferno!"_

Emily's raucus laugh made his heart happy. "What the hell does that mean?"

"My _bella ragazza_ , it means they can go to hell!"

…

 _[E/N: Now you know what happened! I hope you enjoyed it. I'm working on more side-shots for the story. I hope you'll read them and let me know if they're interesting. Xoxo ML]_


	3. Chapter 3

_[A/N: Thank you for reading. This is the last side-shot for 'If Anyone Objects'. I hope you enjoy it. I don't own Criminal Minds. I only borrow.]_

…

 **If Anyone Objects: The Thirteenth Time**

Penelope Garcia entered the office very early on a Thursday morning in early-December. She'd received a call from Morgan regarding a case in Boise, so she got to the office to run background on the information they had from the locals. As she fired up her computers, she pulled up the view of the cameras in the daycare center to see if her favorite boy had been dropped off, noting he wasn't in attendance because he was a mover and she'd have spotted him running around the play area if he was there. Since Nicky had become more mobile, Garcia didn't have to kill herself at the gym as she had in the past. Nicky kept her moving, and she was very happy about her new form of exercise.

When there was a knock, she turned to see her Boy Genius standing at the door with a smile. She was so happy he was back to work. The place wouldn't have been the same without him…that was a fact. "Hey, we're planning a get together at the house for Saturday afternoon. Aaron bought an inflatable skating rink thing-y because Jack has this desire to learn to play hockey. I know Nick isn't exactly ready for skates, but he can slide around in slick shoes. That is, if Aaron can figure out how to get the stupid thing to freeze properly.

"He had it frozen solid once, and then the next three days were in the high forties, so it melted. He's a man possessed, I'll tell you. I've stayed out of it because he seems to forget I'm an engineer, but I'm going to have to step in eventually and that will probably…"

"One-eighty-seven, focus please," Garcia cued.

"Anyway, will you three come? Morgan said we're not going to Idaho because we can deliver the profile over Skype. So?" Reid asked.

Garcia took a deep breath. "I don't run his life, Reid. Morgan's his own man. I'll come, but I can't account for Derek and Nicky," she stated as she pulled up the file regarding the Boise case.

She didn't turn around when she heard the door close behind her. The relationship Garcia had with Morgan was the most confusing thing in her life. She'd hacked some of the best systems in the world with great success and she'd fended off some very ingenious hackers in her time, so it wasn't as if she was stupid. However, dissecting her feelings for Derek Morgan wasn't easy. The first time he'd proposed to her, she'd laughed. He didn't have a ring and he just stated, "Marry me."

It wasn't a proposal. It was a demand, and she most assuredly wasn't going to simply submit to his demands. She loved him, but she wasn't stupid. He'd never stay with someone who wouldn't prove a long-term challenge, and she didn't have to be a profiler to know her Chocolate God wasn't really ready to settle down because if he was, he'd have offered her a proper proposal. He was too romantic at heart, even though he hated to admit it, maybe even to himself.

The subsequent eleven proposals, all in the same vein of demanding instead of asking, had been laughed away. Penelope wasn't looking for a knight-in-shining-armor because she knew they didn't exist. She'd dated enough to know fairy tales weren't real life. Men said things to get their way because they were putting forth their own agenda. She wasn't going to fall for Morgan's. He was looking for a baby momma, not a partner in life, and she wasn't going to be anything less than his equal in a relationship.

"Okay. By the way, can you give me the recipe for the cookies Jack and Aaron love? I'd like to bake cookies for Christmas, but I'm not exactly good at it, though I've been practicing. Well, I've thrown away more than I've actually allowed Jack to eat, but I'm trying," Reid explained with that puppy-dog look she actually loved. It always melted her heart.

Garcia knew her face lit up when an idea hit her radar. "Oh! How about we have a St. Nicholas' Day skating party and a cookie swap? We can draw names for Secret Santa, too. I'll help you make your boys' faves and I'll get JJ, Emily, and Rossi to make theirs. We'll share cookies after the skating party," she offered.

When Reid smiled, she knew she'd struck on a good idea. She'd get everyone to make their favorite cookies and maybe have a bonfire in the firepit she was planning to give Hotch and Reid as an early Christmas gift. They could roast hotdogs with all the fixings, and even make s'mores and hot chocolate. It was going to be a lovely Christmas party she'd basically tricked Reid into hosting. He didn't argue, and it seemed to make both of them very happy.

##

"I don't know what more I can do, Emily," Morgan complained to a very pregnant Prentiss.

Emily yawned before taking a sip of the organic decaf coffee Rossi had imported especially for her. She loved the taste of it, and he'd promised her after the baby came, he'd get her the full-octane version. She smiled when she thought about how wonderful he was to her. She'd always known Rossi had that side of him – the caretaker side - but to have it unleashed on her, full-force, was overwhelming. Well, on occasion. The rest of the time, it was lovely.

"Okay, let's say, hypothetically, I even give a shit about any of this. Give me the full-blown, Derek-Morgan-proposal experience," she demanded as she slipped off the flats she was forced to wear and placed her feet on the little stool under her desk that had miraculously appeared when her ankles started to swell during her seventh month. She wasn't out in the field anyway, being ready to pop, and she didn't really care much about her appearance. Comfort was the key of late, and flat shoes were much more comfortable than her usual boots and heels.

She watched Morgan pace in front of her desk, and it was all she could do to hold the laugh. She knew about the proposal Morgan deemed acceptable because she'd spent enough time in Garcia's office while the team was in the field, and she'd heard about every awful attempt he'd made at trying to get the Senior Tech Analyst to consent to wedded bliss. If the marriage proposal was a victim, they'd have all profiled it as extreme overkill.

Morgan stopped and took a seat before Emily had to yell at him to calm the fuck down. "I know what women want, Prentiss. I haven't been at this as long as I have without learnin' somethin' over the years. I simply wait for a moment when Pen, Nick, and I are doing something as a family, and I say, "Penelope, marry me," he answered.

Emily considered it for a moment. "Let me see the ring," she responded. She knew the answer.

"I don't have it," he responded.

"Where'd you get it? I can look it up," Prentiss told him as she brought her laptop to life.

Morgan shook his head. "No, I mean, I don't have a ring. I thought she'd want to pick it out herself. My sister, Sarah, didn't like the ring her husband, Adam, offered when he proposed, and that cat is a lot more romantic than me. I wouldn't want to get her a ring she wouldn't like, Prentiss."

She sighed heavily. Reeling him in was almost too easy. "Okay, we'll discuss that in a second. Propose to me," she demanded.

Just then, Rossi rushed into the office with a stunned look on his face. When he saw Morgan sitting across from Emily, she noticed the look of relief on his face immediately. "Rossi?" she asked with a cocked eyebrow.

He walked over to her desk and dropped a small bag in front of her. "Peanut butter and marshmallow fluff on whole wheat, lightly toasted. There's also a bottle of coconut milk in there. I don't know how you eat that stuff, Prentiss," he complained.

She laughed as she opened the bag and pulled out her latest craving…the fluffernutter, as Jayje called it. Apparently, it was a staple in Pennsylvania where JJ grew up. She'd made one for herself one day in the kitchen at work, and it smelled so heavenly, Prentiss had to track it down. JJ shared it with her, and after that, Emily couldn't get enough. Once again, David Rossi was spoiling her.

Without waiting for an invitation, Rossi took a seat next to Morgan. "So, why are you proposing to my partner?" he asked.

Emily smiled between bites. Wrestling with their relationship had been more difficult than either had imagined, but they were working through things. He'd asked her to move in, and she was considering it. She couldn't give him more of an answer than that, and it seemed to have appeased him.

"I'm not proposing to Prentiss. She wanted to hear the proposal I've used with Garcia the eleven times I've proposed. I just say, 'Pen, or Garcia, whatever's appropriate. Marry me'," Morgan stated with what appeared to be the comfort of thinking he had proven his point.

Emily looked at Rossi and then looked at Morgan. She smiled at him. "And she's turned you down eleven times? You're kidding, right?" She couldn't hold the sarcasm in her voice. Morgan was so damn ridiculous.

When Rossi rose from his chair and walked around Emily's desk, she was a little surprised. He knelt down next to her chair and pulled out a box from the pocket of his suit jacket, popping it open. Inside was the biggest engagement ring Emily had ever seen, though it wasn't the first time she'd seen it. The diamond, which was canary yellow, would choke a horse. "Emily Prentiss, I love you. I'm still shocked at how easy it was to fall in love with you. I've loved you as a friend for a long time, and now I'm _in_ love with you. I know the answer, but would you please consider marrying me?"

Emily felt the tears in her eyes, not for the first time though it annoyed her just the same, so she reached for the napkin that accompanied her sandwich. After wiping her mouth, she smiled at Dave Rossi. "I love you as well, David, but once again, I'm not ready to get married. I know you're not ready to walk down that aisle again either, but I can't tell you how touched I am that you won't give up.

"I tell you what I will do, though. I'll move in with you. Take that damn thing and return it or donate it to some charity because I'm never going to wear it, but I'll wear a commitment ring from you if you'll wear a matching one. We have a stronger commitment than a piece of paper. We're having a baby together," Emily whispered as she leaned forward and brushed her lips against David's. She was actually crying, and she blamed her hormones.

After they broke the kiss, the pair looked up to see Morgan had slipped out. Rossi smiled. "I'm going to donate this ring to a very good cause, my love. I'm holding you to this moving thing, Em. I'll set it up, and you can keep your place in Reston. We'll work it all out, but thank you for agreeing to move. I want my family under one roof," Rossi told her as he kissed her again.

She actually smiled at her ability to come to the decision. It was time to make several of them, but she'd made a big one. They were going to be a family, after all.

##

Morgan looked up from his desk to see Rossi standing in his doorway later that afternoon. They'd delivered the profile to the Boise authorities over a Skype call, and he felt he'd made the right decision, which he'd confirm with Aaron when the Section Chief returned his call. Reid hadn't been back to work very long from the shooting, but everyone was happy he was back. He was on limited duty and with him not able to travel yet, along with Prentiss being very pregnant, he'd requested Aaron put them on stand-down for large cases. It was kept under the radar because Morgan knew the whole team would bitch about it, but with the current state of the unit, it was for the best.

"What can I do for you, Agent Rossi?" Morgan asked with a smile. He hadn't waited around for Emily's answer to the proposal he'd witnessed in her office, but he was pretty sure of the answer the woman gave the older agent.

"I came by to say, while my proposal was the way to go, you have to make sure your target is receptive. I've proposed to Emily with this ring twelve times now. She's always said no, but today, she agreed to move in with me, and she's agreed to make a permanent commitment to _our_ family. That's more than I've been able to get from her in the past, so I'm giving you this ring to do with it as you see fit," he explained to Morgan as he placed the red leather box on the desk in front of the Unit Chief.

Morgan shook his head. "Dude, I can't use that ring to propose to Garcia. I mean, it's bad luck or something. If you've used it to propose twelve times and the woman's said no…"

Rossi laughed. "On the twelfth time, she agreed to move in with me and make a life. Marriage isn't as important to me as it is to you, Morgan. Emily and I are having a baby together, and we've committed to raise it together. That's much more of a commitment than I had with my ex-wives. Well, except Caroline, but we lost James. Anyway, Garcia likes big rings. Try your hand with this one."

At that, Rossi walked out, leaving the ring on the desk. As Morgan looked at it closely, he could see it wasn't a ring a government agent of the FBI could afford. It was money from having a successful career doing anything other than working for the U. S. government, and Garcia would know he hadn't picked it out himself.

He'd have to think about it, but the whole encounter with Rossi and Prentiss wasn't lost on him. He needed to actually _ask_ Penelope to marry him, not just state it as if it was a given. Humility was called for, and he knew exactly where to get a fair dose of it.

After Rossi left his office, Derek Morgan called his mother, and after explaining things to her and receiving her wrath at his stupidity, he had an actual game plan. He just needed the right set of circumstances to occur so he could put it into motion.

##

When Garcia climbed out of her beloved Caddy, she saw a huge tent in the backyard of the Reid/Hotchner home. The day was actually not bad…sunny and hovering around forty-five degrees, Fahrenheit.

She hurried up to the front porch, seeing two small pine trees in buckets. They had lights on them, though they weren't on because it was still daylight. When JJ opened the door with a smile, Garcia laughed. "I almost ran by your house to see if you guys wanted to ride with me in Esther. I don't see your car," she told her friend.

JJ smiled. "Will got called into work on a case, so he dropped us off. I might need a ride home, later," JJ told her as Garcia entered the home she loved as much as her own apartment.

After Reid's shooting, the two men had decided to do some remodeling instead of moving. They'd worked with an architect to change the inside of the home, and then they'd consulted with her regarding new furniture and accessories. Once she got a feel for their style, she'd been able to hunt down things which appealed to them and reflected their combined tastes. As she looked around, she was elated it all worked together.

"So, did you bring cookies?" Garcia asked as she handed her large container to JJ so she could remove her coat.

"Actually, I brought dough. Spence wants to learn how to time the cookies, so I brought my snickerdoodle dough and I promised him I'd show him how to bake them. Poor guy went to Safeway and bought premade dough. He wants to bake with Jack so badly, but he has no experience because he was too young to learn when his mother used to do it with him before she got sick. I promised him I'd help," JJ explained as the two went to the kitchen.

Garcia smiled, seeing a stack of baking pans at the end of the counter. "I brought the stuff to make the dough because he wants the recipes for the cookies Jack and Hotch love so much. This is going to be more fun than I even anticipated. He bought all of those, didn't he?" she asked as she pointed to the baking sheets.

JJ giggled. "He tried to make Toll House cookies, and they spread such that they just ended up as a glob. He bought twelve pans to bake four cookies on each pan. I think he was making them too large, but I can't be sure. Where's Morgan?" JJ asked, answering Garcia's question regarding whether her sexy obsession was on premises.

"I'm not sure. He didn't call me this morning, so I have to assume he's been busy with Nicky. Anyway, let's go check out this tent set-up. We can bring our sweet Boy Genius inside to do the baking," she suggested.

"Good idea, Pen. I'm going to stay inside and preheat the oven. Send him in when you're all done out there, and please keep an eye on Henry. I bought him a pair of double blade skates, and Hotch assured me he'd help keep him upright, but Jack's trying to learn to skate as well. I'm afraid it's too much for our Section Chief," JJ explained with a chuckle.

When Garcia got outside, she couldn't hold the bright smile at seeing Jack helping Henry around the rink in his little safety skates. They seemed to be having a good time, and she could see Aaron and Spencer watching them carefully. She didn't hesitate to bring out her phone and take a picture for the "family" album.

##

Derek gathered his son and their bags to carry inside. He wasn't a baker. He didn't make cookies. He did, however, petition his mother to make her chocolate macadamia nut cookies and send him five dozen. He explained why it was important, and when she laughed at him, he wanted to tell her to do something unsavory, but it was his mother, so he held his tongue.

When JJ opened the front door, she smiled brightly. "'Bout time you showed. We're having a hard time keeping her occupied. Get your butt to the back yard. The kids are waiting for a party."

He felt his stomach roll again, knowing she also knew his plan. He'd confront Reid later regarding his loose lips, but he needed to concentrate on the task at hand. _Nothing cheesy. Keep it classy._ He'd already spoken with Hotch and Reid, and they assured him everything was in order and he wasn't steeling their thunder for any revelations at the party. It was the thirteenth time the ring was used, and Morgan hoped it would finally be lucky.

##

After pacing the backyard during a phone call from Kevin Lynch regarding an upgrade on the security software that weekend, Garcia assessed the large tent set up in the backyard, she held the laugh. It was just like Hotch and Reid to go overboard. She could see Spencer's engineering degree was hard at work based on the elaborate set-up with some sort of a cooling system in order to keep the rink frozen.

When the flap pulled back, she was stunned to see Morgan standing inside…alone. She looked around to see everyone else had disappeared, and she didn't miss the fact he was on ice skates, either. "I didn't know you skated," she told Morgan as she stared around the tent, noticing things she didn't expect. There were twinkle lights overhead like stars, and she was shocked by how beautiful they actually were. Suddenly, the industrial fans at either end of the tent turned on to cool the space, and they were damn loud.

She watched as Morgan made his way around the twenty-by-forty-foot rink. She didn't even know the hot man could stay up on ice skates. She did know he was a Blackhawks fan, but him on ice? She never put that together.

She cocked an eyebrow at the man as he smoothly skated over to her and slid to a stop. "What?" Morgan asked with a bright smile.

"I didn't know you skated," she yelled as he took her hand to steady himself at the side. Suddenly, the quiet was deafening as the fans clicked off. When Morgan sunk down on one knee, Garcia thought he fell.

She reached to help him up, only to feel both of his large hands engulf hers. "Penelope Garcia, I am more in love with you than I've ever considered loving anyone in my life. I love my son, and I love watching you with him. I know he's not your biological child, but you don't treat him any different than I'd imagine you'd treat a child of your own. You treat the two of us as if we're your family, and I want that. I want it more than anything.

"I want the three of us to be a family, and I hope someday, we'll add to that family having one of our own. I know I'm dense and I didn't get it, but I do now. Pen, my beautiful, crazy, baby girl, will you please do me the honor of marrying me?" Derek asked.

##

Seeing the stunned look on Garcia's face made Derek happy. He'd seen her with a smirk eleven times as she turned him down, but this time, she seemed to understand he was serious. To further fluster her, he pulled the red leather box from his pocket and opened it, showing her the huge yellow diamond. He saw her glance at the ring and then back at him with a worried look on her face. "Jesus, Derek! That's much too…that's like a new house size of a ring. Did you cash in your…" she began. He was glad he'd had the foresight to think it through.

"This ring has been used in a proposal…well, this is the thirteenth time. I thought you might not warm up to it, and really, the thing could support a small country for a year. I took a chance you might feel it was too much, so I bought this," he stated as he place the red leather box on the ice before he pulled out a simple, grey-velvet box, popping the lid.

Inside was a beautiful, emerald cut, one-and-a-half-carat diamond ring set in platinum. It wasn't huge, but it was a perfect stone for the perfect woman.

"OMG. You're serious?" Garcia gasped. Derek saw the tears behind her pink glasses, so he rose from the ice rink and stepped over the edge to the grass, balancing as best he could.

"My sweet girl, I've been serious every time I've asked, but I didn't ask it right. I just said it like it was a foregone conclusion, but you're too good for that shit. I'm sorry it took a while to get through my thick scull, but please marry me. I've asked you twelve times, Penelope, and that yellow diamond has been used thirteen. Let's make it a lucky number. You gotta have a yes in there somewhere," he teased as he looked into her beautiful eyes.

After a deep breath, she smiled at him through her tears. "I'd love to marry you, Derek Morgan." He slipped the ring, not the yellow diamond, on her finger, and after a passionate kiss, the party really got started.

There was skating, cookie baking, and even Christmas carols. The team had a great time, and as Derek watched Penelope enjoying herself as she held Nick on her hip with that new ring on her finger, he was happier than he'd ever been in his life.

He took the ring Rossi had given him over to the man as he and Hotch sat on the deck with cigars and brandy under a heat lamp. "Thanks for letting me borrow this, Rossi. I finally figured out what was missing each of the times I proposed to Garcia. I had to put a little personal spin on it and think about what my girl would really want," he explained.

When Rossi started laughing, Morgan was confused. "What's up?"

Without a word, Rossi put the garish ring on the deck floor and stomped it. When his foot moved off it, the diamond and the setting were crushed. "Seriously?" Morgan asked.

"Do you really think Prentiss would go for a ring like that? Oh, trust me, I looked at a real one like it, but then I allowed my brain to catch up to my heart, just like you did. Garcia didn't want that ring either, Morgan. She's not after you for what you can give her, just like my Emily. She wants a man to love her, just like everyone else, right Aaron?" Rossi explained.

Hotch laughed. "Don't box me in. I have my own plan, Dave, and it doesn't include anyone from the team. Congratulations, guys," Hotch offered as he held up a glass of bourbon. The three toasted, and as they looked up at the clear sky, each man had his own reasons to be thankful. It had been a great night.

…

 _[E/N: So, there we go. We got Prentiss/Rossi and Morgan/Garcia settled. Tomorrow night I'll post the epi to "If Anyone Objects." I appreciate your support. Xoxo ML]_


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